Are you sick and tired of feeling sick and tired? If you are reading this article, chances are you are saying “yes!” and nodding your head as you read this. You’re in the right place, we are going to talk about how to finally take control of your life in 2017!
Everyone wants a better life, but few are willing to take charge and make it happen. Why? I personally feel it’s the accumulation of fears and a lack of personal responsibility that are to blame. Anyone can take charge of their life, choose to be happy and transform it into something exciting and fulfilling!
It’s never too late. Let’s discuss how you can finally take control of your life and put yourself in the driver’s seat.
Take Responsibility
It all starts here. I talk about this in the workbook for my Tame Your Finances (& Save $5,000 in the Process) course. You are the only person responsible for your life. And you are the only one who can control your life. If you believe anything else, you are living in a fantasy and your situation will never change. That doesn’t mean that everything is your fault, but it is your responsibility to deal with your life.
Are you waiting for a partner, a spouse, a friend or a co-worker to change into something different so you can approve of them or the situation? If you are, you will be waiting for a long time. If you want a situation to change, the change has to start with you. Taking responsibility is powerful because it moves you from the victim into a place of power to change yourself and/or the situation.
You start to see solutions that may have never occurred to you before. You realize what needs to change within you and then the people around you begin to change. It’s an amazing thing once this process starts!
Raise Your Standards
I could scream this one from the rooftops ladies! Why are you settling for less in your relationships, your career or your bank balance? Why are you putting up with being treated in a way that makes you feel poorly, accepting not being acknowledged for the good you do or anything else in your life that is less than what you actually want? It’s time to raise your standards and the only way to do this is by deciding what you want in all areas of your life & letting others know how you feel. You have a voice, use it!
You do not have to settle for less. You CAN have what you want and you ARE worthy of it. You really are. You are worthy of every dream and desire you have in your heart & your life does not have to be a struggle. No one will get to the end of their life and wish they had struggled more, beat themselves up more or continued to focus on all their human flaws more. Start to see the good in yourself & focus on what it is you DO want, not what you DON’T want.
When you think negatively about yourself & have low standards for the people, your finances and the experiences in your life, you lower your expectations. You even begin to look for reasons to support those thoughts. This is the ultimate in self-defeating behaviors! Your feelings of self-worth influence your ability to be happy and successful. Be proud of who you are as a person & own it. Raise your standards and don’t accept less than what you want. You are worthy of having what you want.
The willingness to accept your current circumstances is a decision to maintain your current life. Set your standards accordingly.
Avoid Being Afraid of Failure
It’s going to happen and guess what? IT’S FINE. Failure is fine, don’t let anyone tell you any different. It means you got out there, you tried to make it happen. Now you know what didn’t work so the next time you can make improvements and try again.
None of this is bad! It’s all part of the process, the breadcrumbs in your life that are leading you along your path and you never know what you may find along the way. This is the primary obstacle for most people and why they don’t get what they want in life. They’re afraid of failing.
I have an example of this in my own life. For nearly 2 years I was a Rodan + Fields Skincare consultant. I loved the products & the business and wanted to share it with other women. I worked really hard at my business but the whole time something just wasn’t clicking with me and the business. I talked to a lot of people about the company & the products and I was able to help people and that made me really happy. But it still wasn’t clicking.
After I signed up another consultant, I was so happy. I remember standing in my kitchen and thinking to myself “Now I get to coach other women in their businesses!”. I stopped and thought “wait a minute, that’s actually what I really want to do. I want to be a coach not an R&F consultant.” The reason it wasn’t clicking for me is because the business just wasn’t for me, but what was for me was coaching other woman! After that moment, I realized something huge. What I thought was a failure actually led me along the path to exactly where I needed to be. Had I not been an R&F consultant, who knows how long it would have taken me to realize what I really wanted to be doing was coaching!
Shortly after that, I enrolled in a coaching program and 4 months later I had my first paying client for my lifestyle design coaching program! How amazing is that? I can’t stress the importance of just getting out there and going after and doing what interests you. Failure is not always a bad thing and I can almost guarantee you if you try and fail, it will lead you right into the next steps of where you want to go.
The more you fail, the more successful you will be, as long as you learn from your failures and keep trying. How boring would it be to only do the things you know you can do?
Stop Caring What Others Think
One of my mentors use to say “what you think of me is none of my business.” The first time I heard this I couldn’t wrap my head around it. Of course it’s my business, how could it not be? But if you think about it, it’s the perfect statement because you can do everything right and someone still isn’t going to like you, agree with you or understand where you are coming from. We weren’t put on this planet to agree with each other, contrast isn’t a bad thing! But you’ve got to let go of what other people think of you.
I will admit, this one is not easy for me. I mean, why wouldn’t I care what others think?! It can be hurtful when someone thinks negatively of us, doesn’t agree with us or gossips behind our back. But you do not have control over what others think of you. It’s a waste of your time and energy to worry about it too.
No matter what you do, you’re being judged by others & there’s nothing you can do about it. So let go of it focus on the good, not the bad.
The willingness to accept your current circumstances is a decision to maintain your current life. Set your standards accordingly.Click To TweetEmbrace Discomfort
I’ve been doing consulting work for 7 years now and one of my old managers use to say “get comfortable with being uncomfortable”. He said this to us because as consultants, we were often put on new projects with very little knowledge or understanding of what was going on, but expected to hit the ground running and begin solving and fixing problems right away.
At first I resisted this. It scared me, it was uncomfortable and I was afraid of failure. But now I’ve come to love it. It excites me and motivates me! I love being put on a project I have no idea about because I also bring a fresh perspective to what has been going on & I’m able to help solve problems.
If you think about it, life is the same way. We are often in situations that we don’t know anything about or have never experienced before. If you want to change any aspect of your life, it will feel uncomfortable at first. But get comfortable with being uncomfortable, don’t resist it. You’ll be amazed at the experiences you have and how much personal growth & development you experience from making this one change in your life.
Be Proactive
Taking control of your life also involves avoiding unnecessary challenges by anticipating issues that might come up. There’s no better way to do this than being proactive in every area of your life.
What do I mean by being proactive? Look ahead for potential challenges and avoid them. For example, do you have an outstanding bill that you want to challenge but haven’t made the time to call and straighten it out? Being proactive means you make these types of smaller issues a priority to get resolved so they don’t turn into bigger things that could have been prevented. If you don’t make the time to call about the bill, you could end up having your account turned over to a collection agency and damage your credit rating.
Another example of being proactive is making sure you maintain things that are important in your life. Does the check engine light keep coming on in your car or do you know you have an issue with a leak at your home but you keep avoiding them? Take the time to address these small issues before they turn into more costly things for you to deal with.
Most negative experiences can be predicted and avoided. Avoid being reactive in your life because by then it’s too late!
Decide What You Want
To finally take control of your life, you need to decide what you want. The reason this is so important is for the decision-making aspect. You have to make decisions get what you want and take control of your life. This gets you out of waiting around for something to happen & staying in a place of “maybe” all the time.
Make a few decisions and decide what you want this year. Are finally ready to take charge of your life? Are you tired of pretending that you’re a victim? You can choose the direction of your life. Take responsibility and work through your fears, a little discomfort for a short amount of time is a small price to pay for a life that you enjoy!
What tips do you have to take control of your life in 2017? If you are looking for help taking control of your finances, check out my course Tame Your Finances & Save $5,000 in the Process to learn more.